Recently I’ve heard of several people, including some of our documentary subjects, who have fallen a bit off track (some might call it a relapse).

Often, “relapse” is a term used in the world of addiction, and I guess this term can be relevant in maintaining healthy eating habits as well. The truth is, anyone can relapse, no matter how successful they’ve been in the past. There are no guarantees that we can always stay on top of things.

So the good news, is there’s no reason to feel like a failure if we’ve gained some or all of our weight back.

I remember when this happened to my wife and me, just after our honeymoon. We had worked so hard to get into great shape, only to let it slowly slip away in a matter of a couple of months. We were on our way back to where we started!

But then, something stopped us - call it luck, or whatever…but we were fortunate to have an external event stop us down the path we were going. The people from the Body-for-LIFE contest, began calling Mariah to interview her about her physical transformation - because she was in the running to win the contest! While it was exciting - it was a wake up call! Who knows what would have happened if we never got the phone call. Nevertheless, it was at that moment when we decided to turn it back around - and get back on track.

We learned a very valuable lesson. No matter how quickly and how successfully you lose weight and get into great shape - you can gain it back even faster! One bad meal a week, turns into two or three. Two extra pounds quickly turns into 5 or 10 extra pounds…and that’s when we stop weighing ourselves. Because we don’t want to see how bad it’s become. We think we are just a few pounds away from our goal, so our minds allow us to stay comfortable with the idea that “we know what to do”. This however, is the problem sometimes. Our confidence gets the best of us, and we forget that our motivation to stay on track gets negatively affected the further we have to go. So as we allow that “comfort zone” to widen, our ability to motivate ourselves to stay on course weakens.

This happens to many people every year. Weight Watchers lifetime members stop attending meetings, because they don’t want to see the damage they’ve done. The very accountability that helped them succeed is exactly what they do not want — because it’s a tough thing to face the fact that while you were so successful, you may be back to where you started. It’s like almost getting to the top of a mountain, and slipping, only to end up at the bottom again, looking up at the distance to climb back to where we had ascended to.

Everyone always says, the difficult part is “maintaining”. While this sounds good, there’s nothing mystical about it. There isn’t going to be a time when we no longer love to eat pizza, cookies and candy…our favorite foods will always be there for us! Temptation is always around us, and the social tendency is to eat with friends and family, to celebrate and to cope with life events. So this idea that we can eat perfectly forever is really difficult - impossible to do all the time, for the rest of our lives. We won’t always be able to eat right, and we will (most of us) fall of track from time to time. The key, we have discovered, have more to do with understanding the importance of constant accountability and goal setting in life - and when we get rid of our accountability and fail to set new goals, we inevitably start to lose ground. So the so-called Yo-Yo diet syndrome has less to do with dieting and more to do with our human nature…to eat what we love to eat!
Ultimately, we can only choose to go in one direction - the right one, or the wrong one. So I say, might as well head back now…for us, it was a valuable lesson, that while we can be so successful, we can also lose track of what keeps us accountable and motivated, and easily let it all slip away. If you’ve gained some weight back that you’ve previously lost, don’t worry, consider yourself smarter for it. Time to head back.

“Some of the best lessons we ever learn, we learn from our mistakes and failures. The error of the past is the success and wisdom of the future.” — Tyron Edwards, Theologian

We’ve been getting a lot of inquiries lately about WHEN our film will be ready. I suspect it’s because a lot of people are hoping to get some good ideas and motivation as they enter into a new year, with their new year’s resolutions! I won’t go into extreme detail on some of these ideas, but I will try to summarize some of the most important lessons we’ve learned along the way. Here goes:

1) One person can make all the difference. If we can find a person who makes us more successful we must STAY CLOSE to this person, because one person can steer us in the right direction (this might be a friend, mentor, coach, trainer). Also remember that one person can also make all the difference in a negative way. We have to remember this, that while our will can be stronger than outside temptations, being realistic about the people in our lives that influence us will give us a better chance of success every single time. Remember, EACH OF US, can be that person who makes all the difference in someone else’s life.

2) Consistency is the key. There are many factors involved in weight loss, but the most important we’ve seen, is the idea of consistency. When we commit to eating right every day of the week, instead of 3 or 4 out of 7 days, the results we will see make all the difference from a psychological perspective. This holds true for exercise too. If you can exercise 6-7 days per week (not overdoing the amount or the intensity), the change in our mindset toward exercise makes us NEED to exercise every day. This important psychological change happens in nearly everyone, but the first 3 weeks are the tough part. Exercising almost every day doesn’t give us the opportunity to put it off until “tomorrow” - because we know our goal is to do it every day. It is not so much which “diet” or which “exercise” we choose, but it’s more about how consistently we can conform to some sort of structure.
3) Moderation is the ultimate goal. Nobody can really sustain extreme behavioral changes forever. Some of us need to make them in the beginning to see really early success, so we remain motivated. Still, we must understand that our ultimate goal is to devise our OWN lifestyle that is balanced, and can include most things in life, just as long as we understand the consequences and remain in tune with what direction we are going. If you start out trying to exercise 2 hours per day, you will burn out and will eventually quit altogether, so start small (20-30 minutes) and allow your mind to adjust to the changes in lifestyle over time (not too gradually, but don’t go overboard from the beginning).

4) Intentions are not the same as actions. We all “intend” to do the right thing when we enter a restaurant. We all “intend” to exercise after work…but we need to realize that often our intentions are sidetracked by sudden impulses or stresses in life. When we can develop strategies that alter our behavior and make us more consistent, our intentions become more aligned with our actions. (If you are trying to lose weight, going out to eat more than 1 or 2 times per week is testing your will to follow through with your intentions. If you find you cannot be consistently good, you have to be honest with yourself and not go out to eat so much).

5) Most of us have no idea what we are capable of. It’s sometimes good to remind ourselves that ALMOST EVERYONE underestimates what they can do. This allows our minds to open up to new possibilities, new challenges in life. It also helps to get a mentor, coach, or trainer, whose job is to help you learn what your own potential really is, because most of us do not really see it clearly. (If you think you’ll never be a “runner” - you are only limiting what you are capable of doing). Life is short - stop limiting your life’s experience and go for it.

6) We do not hold ourselves very accountable. Our minds are tricky, and our brain plays tricks on us all the time. Even when we know what we should do deep inside, we can almost always come up with a reason why we can eat something bad, or skip a workout, and it all makes such great sense in our minds. After all we deserve a break, a treat, and we’ll get back on track on the 2nd Monday of the month, right? Don’t fall into the “I’m going to do this all by myself” mentality. Find AS MANY external accountability measures as you can, and you will be infinitely more successful. Journals, weight loss groups, coaches, and workout partners all make more of a difference than you think.

7) It is often the little things that make all the difference.  Don’t ignore any obstacle, because it could be the sole reason you do not succeed.
More to come…

I wish everyone could understand the perspective that each single individual has the incredible ability to alter human events, every single day - far beyond their own lives.

I reflect upon each time anyone, a stranger, a friend…ANYONE, has said something positive to us about our project, or helped us for nothing in return.  Some may think our team is made up will go-getters, who refuse to fail at anything, who have unlimited motivation.  That is far from the truth!  Self-doubt is something we encounter each day, and whether we like it or not, it impacts our ability to act at times, and hinders our momentum.
If each day, when we choose to act, we understand the impact our actions can have on another person, positive or negative, we hopefully guide our actions to make more of a difference.  It can be the smallest thing, a phone call, an email…even a blog comment, that changes how we attack our day, and it always amazes me how much good it does on our own perspective.

Thank you, to everyone who has ever lifted us up, given us greater hope, that our project can do something important.  You have made an incredible difference.

It’s a tough thing to look at oneself objectively and to see what is really going on with our lives. Most of the time we just see things through our own eyes, and try to make sense of it all.

But I guess my hope is that by watching our documentary, many people will be able to take a step outside of their bodies, and understand how they themselves think, rationalize, make good decisions…and bad ones. This is something that we all can do I believe, as long as we don’t go crazy doing it!

Can we see through our own rationalizations (some might call these excuses) and find ways around them? Often it is our ability to really analyze what we are saying to ourselves, that determines how well we can break through old thought patterns and create profound change in our lives. Is it really “impossible” for us eat breakfast even if we’re not hungry in the morning? Do our schedules really not allow us to exercise 20 minutes every day? Is it true that we just weren’t born as “runners”?

Most of the time, we have found, these are self-imposed limitations which become self-fulfilling prophecies. So the challenge then becomes, for each of us to evaluate what we really want out of our lives, whether it’s money, wealth, companionship…ANYTHING - and learn to identify the obstacles we place in front of ourselves. Because these obstacles, no matter how real they may seem, are usually only obstacles in our own minds. AND - they stand between where we are now, and were we dream to be in life.

Sometimes we wait, expecting that all the stars come into alignment, and it finally becomes “the time”. This “wait” can often be years, decades even. We enjoy the short term decisions we make to eat poorly, and abstain from exercise, but we fail to see how much richer our lives are when we feel good about ourselves. This is the challenge…to get people to understand how much the payoff is worth. Every time, with every person, the payoff far outweighs the effort - in hindsight. It is before and during when we question it all so much.

Some people think that all the people we’ve encountered in the making of this film have had tremendous success, and that it’s what the movie is all about - succeeding.  Not so!  We’ve actually had a lot of our documentary subjects disappear, give up, and stop communicating with us.  The one thing we’ve learned over this long process is that it’s so easy for many of us to give up on our greatest hopes — and we think this happens for many different reasons.

While we truly believe this idea applies to all of life, let’s look at it from a perspective of weight loss.

In the beginning, we may feel there is so much hope for change, and we’re inspired to act.  So we begin this process of weight loss with all the excitement in the world, believing that anything is possible.  Many of us will react to adversity in different ways, and it has a lot to do with our perception of our ability to overcome things in life, particularly to lose weight when things aren’t going our way.

Whether it’s lack of progress, stresses at work or at home, we begin to question whether the food changes, the exercise, is really worth it.  We think…

“Maybe this isn’t the right time in my life to do this.”

“I am just too old for this.  Nobody my age can really get into great shape.”

“My body is just different.  I shouldn’t expect to really get much out of all this work.”

“Why are people so focused on their looks?  I think people should feel good about themselves and accept who they are.”

“Nobody has all of the things going on in my life, like I do.  So they just have more time to do this than I do.”

“What’s the use?”

Ok, so I’ll be the first to admit, that these thoughts to cross my mind all the time, but the perspective of what they may really mean to me have become vastly different over this filmmaking process.
Yes, these are all EXCUSES!  Don’t feel guilty if you’ve thought about them…everyone does from time to time.

The truth(s) are:

1) Life-changing decisions can by made in a single instant.  While some of us wait for all the right conditions to succeed, it is when we decide that we are going to overcome, that we are able to ignore our negative thoughts.  You can decide this very instant, that you will change your own life.  Don’t expect someone else to do it for you.

2) Incredible change is possible for all of us, and it happens rapidly.  If we choose not to try, are we OK with being unhappy, depressed, and complacent about our lives?   Don’t expect the world in a month.  This will take several, as long as you work at it.

3) It is worth it.  There is nothing more important in the world, than our health and our happiness.  (If you disagree, feel free to email us and tell us what is more important in life.)

4) If you think you’ve tried it all, think again.  Most people have just not put it all together, even when they think they have.  There is so much that all of us still have to learn, and nothing comes to us instantly.  This process of change happens over time, because each time we hit a new milestone we learn something new about ourselves and what we are capable of.

If life seems dismal, hopeless, and just plain awful at this moment, remember the hope that things will change can come from within.  Without hope, you will stay depressed, for who knows how long.  Reach out to those who push you in the right direction to get your mindset ready to give it another try.

So stop feeling sorry for yourself, get back up and give it another go.

There are many people who feel as though rapid weight loss is not the best “way” to do it. The common perception is that the faster you lose the weight, the quicker you gain it back.

Often I think, that people look at the correlation, and not the actual causation, as with many thing related to weight loss.

While I believe that both gradual and fast weight loss are possible and viable solutions (depending on the specific method), there are many different aspects to each approach that complicate the issue. There is no black and white and answer that can tell us if faster or slower is better for us.

Many times, those who lose weight on a rapid weight loss program, do not fully adopt new and healthy eating and exercise habits. So the act of losing weight is not what causes the weight gain, but rather, the rate at which one goes back to old habits.

So, in some cases, when one goes on a very low calorie (1200 or less) or food restrictive diet, one that is pretty difficult, and near impossible to follow for a long period of time, we quickly come to an “end” of the diet, and bounce back to our poor eating habits, sometimes in response to the long period of perceived deprivation. It is not the diet, but the psychological rebound that we experience after we finish a strict diet, that causes the rapid weight gain. The same is true for an intense exercise program.

Conversely, a gradual weight loss program, while having the best chance for longer term behavioral change, is sometimes, well…too gradual for most people’s tastes. It can be a long road if we lose 1-3 pounds per month, and don’t feel our efforts are worth the reward. In today’s environment, with all of the temptations toward unhealthy eating and sedentary lifestyle, it is very easy for us to go back to our old ways, when the changes we make are not seemingly worth the trouble.

For many, the idea of losing weight slowly for 2 years can be daunting, and since most people want instant results, we cannot wait for 2 years to see the results of our effort. We have followed some documentary subjects for over a year, and they have lost very little weight. At some point in time they may have lost 20 pounds quickly, but in the long run they cannot see the big picture of losing just a few pounds a month. After a couple of years this can add up to over 60 pounds.

What does all this mean? Nothing really! The pace at which you lose weight doesn’t matter, if you have the right perspective of what you are trying to do. In the end, there is no “finish” to a healthy lifestyle, so if you keep this in mind, and learn the necessary things along the way, your weight loss journey can actually be pretty quick. On the other hand, don’t under estimate the power of gradual change, because time flies faster than you think, and if you have a lot of weight to lose, you’ll find yourself 100 pounds less in a year or so if you just stick to it and make gradual change in the right direction.

The best approach to this, in my opinion, is to take dual approach. Set mini goals that allow you to “sprint” towards your goal, and take little breaks in between where you are “briskly walking” toward you goal. This allows you to take advantage of times in your life that allow you to focus on your exercise and eating more than other times…just as long as your “rest periods” are still moving you forward (which sometimes means you still need to get on that scale to see which direction you are headed).

As usual, I’ve written a bunch of words that might just cancel each other out. Hopefully it makes some sense…

A lot of interesting new observations as we wrap up filming…trying to get the last remaining bits of potential out of our documentary subjects, without actually demanding that they do anything.  It can be a tricky thing!

This week, we learned a great deal about how important encouragement can be to our mindset, and our ability to stay on course…or to stay motivated.  Again, as most of what I write here falls within the category of “common sense” - I often have to remind myself of these things and how important they are.

No matter what we are trying to accomplish, doing something really great takes a lot of hard work — sometimes for an extended amount of time.  Day in, day out, we try to eat the right things, exercise, and while we may find a lot of personal satisfaction in doing things right, we ALL need to have some sort of confirmation that what we are doing is worthwhile (or at least the majority of us).

What we have found, is that it is critically important to revitalize our motivation periodically, and this often comes in the form of positive and sincere encouragement from others.  If we’ve worked hard to achieve something, like fit into a new size of clothing, and a friend or spouse says, “just a little bit more and you will fit into a smaller size” - we can take this to mean we haven’t done a great thing…yet.  So in many ways, we must all pay attention to our ability to propel someone forward, or to pull them down.

The difference between providing encouragement that involves constructive criticism and encouragement that is pure and simple, is sometimes very subtle, but it can make all the difference.  For example:

“It’s great you fit into a size 6, you should definitely be able to get to a size 4!”

and

“I am so proud of you for reaching such a great goal.  Let’s celebrate by going shopping!”

Even though our intentions with both are positive, and meant to be encouraging, we have seen a profound difference in the impact on a person’s motivation to keep going.  It has something to do with our own feeling of being in control of our own goals, and if we feel like someone else has set goals for us, that we may rebel against these, even if they are in line with our own goals.

So even though we agree with what a person is saying to us, we may not like the fact that a new goal is imposed upon us without our consent.  This often depends on who is saying it, since a mentor who we look for very critical feedback might push us no matter what we do.  A spouse or friend however, we do not expect such judgement at times.

In the end, we cannot control what is said to us - so the best we can do is to realize how the words we choose impact the motivation of others to keep going harder than ever, or to lose motivation all together.  So encourage someone today, and you can more difference than you think.

The universal nature of this idea is evident in our own journey to create this film.  When a friend tells us they are so proud of what we are doing, or when a stranger sends us an email of encouragement, it re-energizes us, and propels us to work harder, which is a pretty basic, yet amazing part of life.

What we say matters.

We continue to learn even after two years of filming, that often the things we don’t think should really matter much at all, matter more than we can imagine.  As with so many things in the film, there is so much common sense that goes along with these things, that many people will think that we haven’t really uncovered much at all.

I’d disagree.

Often, because of a bit of laziness, we forego a few things that we know are beneficial to what we are trying to do, unaware that these subtle things can make all the difference.  I will try to give a few examples of this:

Food containers: There are so many levels to “eating good” - most of which is relative to the way we each “used to” eat.  A couple years ago, my wife and I met Jenn Hendershott at a seminar she held in Atlanta.  I remember sitting in on one of her talks where she discussed how she ate.  Now for most average people, these talks are the ones that define what we may feel is on the “extreme” end of eating.  I guess that is because this was a discussion on how to eat if you are trying to become Ms. Fitness Olympia (another topic).  The interesting thing I picked up from her habits was the size of her food containers.  They were pretty small as I recall. 

Up until this point, we never really paid much attention to this.  We had a few different shapes and sizes of plastic containers, most of them medium to large size, and we didn’t always use them (because we just ate what we prepared).  We decided that we were going to “stock up” on a smaller size and try to use them more often.  We purchased a lot of 9 oz. containers.  When we show these to most people, they gasp at how little it is…mostly because people in general are so used to eating too much!

It wasn’t long before we’d make food for work or for the day, and we would put our portions in these small containers.  We’d keep some in the fridge, and Mariah would take them to work with her.  Although we were already in pretty decent shape, we always try to improve each year (a mindset I’d suggest everyone adopt because it keeps you going in the right direction).  We found that our eating and portions were more consistent, and we noticed how much easier it was to make progress or maintain.

While it may sound a bit extreme to some, by using these smaller containers to control our portions, we were no longer storing large amounts of chili, mashed sweet potatoes, grilled chicken, etc. into larger containers, where each meal we’d serve ourselves into another bowl or plate.  We were separating our portions out in advance.  We still do this - and it ultimately becomes someone natural to us to do this.  We do not think about when will stop this habit — because this habit is aligned with our goals…it is part of our current lifestyle.  This may change someday, but for now, it fits.

Purchasing the right size, and enough of the right food containers can change your life? Subtle, I know.  It wasn’t until a year later when we met Brian Wansink, author of Mindless Eating, and we realized what we had learned was scientifically studied in a research lab.  Pretty cool!

So we have learned that, a simple action that seems insignificant, can make all the difference.  This is something I remind myself each day and it always applies to some aspect of what I’m trying to do.  Other actions that can impact our health more than we think…

Music: If we are not listening to our favorite music that is fast paced, we are missing out on the incredible difference it makes when we are exercising.  You do not need an iPod - any 20 dollar mp3 player will make us walk or run faster than normal, and make it seem easy with the right music.  I once watched Rocky IV on my portable DVD player and the visual stimulus even made the workout more intense.  The right music affects exercise profoundly.  I know common sense.  Do you follow it?

Food journals: I hate doing it too…but it always boils down to how badly we want something.  If we can try a new habit, such as writing down what we plan to eat, and what we eat each day, it can soon become habit, and not so annoying.  Most of us (me included), believe that we can keep all of this in our heads, and that it is not really necessary.  However, the subtle difference of knowing we have to write it down when we have 10 french fries, will change what we do.  Don’t forget those 2 pieces of candy you ate…and the handful of nuts…if it’s really possible to understand how such small changes in our daily routine can affect our focus and consistency, then we can use these “tools” to get us where we dream of going.

Training logs:  What speed did you walk at yesterday?  Was it challenging?  How fast can you run a mile?  Are you improving over time, or just doing the same thing everyday?  A training log, just as a food journal, impacts what you do in the gym, or wherever you exercise.  It allows you to see more clearly what you are doing, and most of the time, this is telling you to stop doing the same thing every day!

Proper shoes: Prevent injury, right?  Most of us procrastinate to buy the right ones until we’ve already felt some pain.

Heart rate monitors, enough exercise clothes, pre-planning meals, the list goes on…the point is, when you come across a tip that you feel you do not need to succeed…first try it for a couple of weeks to be sure.  You may be overlooking the subtle, yet profound impact it will have on your life.

None of this is groundbreaking, I know.  Or is it? 

Have a great week, and try something new!

A lot of times we seek absolute answers - the best diet, the best abdominal exercise, the best type of cardio…I guess this is probably just in our human nature to want to quantify things in some way.

What we have come to learn is that from a bigger picture, these classifications of absolutes often don’t help us with our consistent behavior, so there is so much variability on what we get out of any diet or exercise program.  This holds true for our motivation as well.  There are so many factors in life that affect our motivations to focus on one thing or the other, in this case, our physical condition and lifestyle…

We have seen one person be extremely motivated to eat the right thing, for a single meal, a single day…even as long as several months.  But the truth is that motivation is a difficult thing to predict, and it has so many different variables which affect it.

For example, if we turn our cameras on a documentary subject who hasn’t been eating right for several days, suddenly the motivation to eat properly or exercise a little bit harder increases, because of the external factors in our environment.  When we turn the cameras off, and the kids start screaming for McDonalds, it can be a different story.

So ultimately, our motivation has a tendency to ebb and flow, and we must accept this to a certain degree. We will see periods of intense motivation, where we do everything right, and then we see other times when there is little to no motivation to do the “right” things that will advance us closer to our goals.

How then, can we change this unpredicability?  (remember, that these are only theories we are constructing as we continue to piece together this film)

Remember how our mindset affects what we do?  As our motivation ebbs and flows, we can try to practice a couple of things:

1) We must remember that no matter what our last bad action was, that each new day represents a chance to change the direction of our lives.  It is sometimes a difficult thing to change our direction, but we must remind ourselves that despite our lack of motivation to eat right and exercise for the past week or month…this can change instantly.

2) We must remind ourselves of the long term outlook.  The longer we prolong our decision to change, the worse the problem can get…and our depression or unhappiness will persist.  In other words, the problem will not go away unless we attack it with a new strategy, NOW.  Common sense of course…but sometimes we need to be reminded of this I think.

3) Sometimes we are not capable of pulling ourselves out of a rut (ok, well most of the time).  We must realize this ourselves!  We must then, take specific action to change our own mindset, which is an extremely difficult thing to do.  Sometimes this means finding a friend, mentor, or coach who we know always can motivate us.  These people challenge what we do, create interesting perspectives that help us rationalize positive behavior, and give us a little boost in times when we are not too interested in doing the right things.  When we can do this, we can improve our ability to stay motivated or to get remotivated. 

4) During our motivated “state”, we must take specific actions that will reduce the chances of us losing motivation.  The most powerful way to do this is by creating an environment for ourselves that improves our chances.  Making little bets with friends, joining a community of other forward thinking individuals (weight watchers, overeaters anonymous, running clubs, boot camps)…these are steps we should take when we are motivated, even if we feel we do not need them at the moment…mostly because we must remember that our motivation, while very intense at one moment, can be lost very quickly.  When we go to dinner with friends that are trying to be healthy and motivate each other, our ability to resist temptation is far greater than with friends who don’t particularly care.

5) Remember the things that lift us up.  An inspirational movie, website, or book of positive sayings.  Often when I get stuck during this filmmaking process, I go back to the documentaries that inspired us in the first place.  Sometimes this is hard to do when we are feeling negative or in a rut.  Keep a list of these things, to remind us when we forget!

We can rationalize away why we shouldn’t do these things, why we are waiting for the perfect moment.  Just remember the perfect moment is rare.  We might wait for the perfect moment for a long time. 

Today is the perfect day to get remotivated and set some new goals for ourselves, that make us excited about our future.

This week we were fortunate enough to meet up with Bone Crusher, who is a great rapper out of Atlanta, as well as one of the greatest success stories from VH1’s Celebrity Fit Club.  Whenever we try to get someone else to help us with our project, the trick is to get them to see how valuable it could be to the world, as well as their own interests.  We’ve been really lucky with celebrities so far, but the key is to just keep on trying.  Sooner or later things fall into place.

No word yet about whether he will help us out, but we are crossing our fingers…

See me trying to pitch it to Bone Crusher…

  

Click To Play